Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
