Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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