It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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