Say something about gay babies.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I just googled if crying burns calories
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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