So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
