google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
