just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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