Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
