i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
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The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
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he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
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