I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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