can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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