Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Found the puke drawer
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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