I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize