yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
We have started to decorate penises.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
