I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
3 2 1 whiskey
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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