My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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