Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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