Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
