i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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