no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
