To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
