I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize