His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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