i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
