i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
