Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
We don't watch enough power rangers
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
