We should be called the Road Head Warriors
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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