It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You don't make any sense
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