I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
