i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
