it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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