Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
