Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.