You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
