addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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