Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
