he shaved USA in his pubs
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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