if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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