Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.