id be glad to
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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