You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
