This girl is more easily done than said...
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
