Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
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