bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.