that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.