i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize
