dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
