what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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