I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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