Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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