First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Randomize